So Up & Down...

Hope everyone had a lovely Chrissy and got spoiled.... I know i did... :) I got Singstar, am so stoked, hehe I am such a wannabe singer lmao!
Had the in laws up from Chrissy Day til sunday(today) my mother in law did my head in, so rude, anti social and nasty, made me feel soooo uncomfortable in my pwn home!!! Iv never felt that way around someone before, i kept trying and trying to make an effort to talk to her, make conversation, make her feel at home, but she gave me nothing back, not even a smile, and i would catch her staring at me! By sunday i was totally over making an effort and when they left i told my fiance how i felt, he was like its not you, its my mum, shes like that with everyone, don't take it personally! But i can't help but feel it is personal, she will be mopey and sour when its just her and i or my family and her, then when my man comes into the room she is all smiles, and happy, so two faced...When he was out of the room, his mum and i were making chit chat and i said something like "yeh he's my baby, I love him" and she turned to me and said, "well he is MY baby" but in a really mean and cold tone...i was shocked.
I think i may be coming across as a bitch, hope not..... lol....just a sticky situation, and my fiance and i were arguing about it, then i thought im not going to argue over his mum and let her come between us!!! Am i wrong to feel this way? Any tips or advice would be happily welcomed!!!???
Now i know everyones been busy with Chrissy but why hasn't ANYONE left me a comment? :( im feeling like no one is interested in my blogs anymore!? God im a sook haha!
Can't believe how excited iam to be getting closer to getting my Band ("Pammy"), 2009 is going to bring such a new and amazing journey and iv actually surprised myself in telling a few more people about getting Banded, and have not had a bad reaction yet... Though my brother recommended i check out some similar procedure that uses bubbles to squish the stomach and has same effect but it isnt clamped around ur stomach so apparently better...anyone know what he is talking about? i couldn't find it cause he didn't know what it was called??? Anyone heard of the stomach being erroded from a Band? thats my only main concern...
Splurged a little over chrissy and got sooo much damn choccy, i was thinking oh geez thanks, r u trying to make me fatter! LOL so im trying to give them to good homes... Getting back on track though, not really stressing anymore.
Am going to start my Diabex tomorrow for my Insulin Resistance and PCOS my Doc said that is probably why iam so tired and run down all the time, my cells aren;t getting the sugar they need and i think she may be right! So will get back on them and see what happens and also hope the side effects don't come back with em.
I hope everyone is enjoying their holidays and are keeping happy and safe!!! All the BEST for 2009...may it be a happy, fulfilling, and eventful New year for each of you and i hope all ur dreams,wants and needs come true!!!!

HO HO F**King Ho

Well i haven't blogged for a while...have been flat out with work, shopping and an endless mountain of presents to wrap...eeek where is Santa when u need him hahaha!!!??? ;), Alot has been goin on, we put an offer in on a house, and nearly had it, but the agent kept screwing us around and giving us false info, so we missed out, was disappointed but there will be more houses out there... just hope we find one soon as the thrill of house hunting is losing appeal fast lol.
My fiance is selling his boat tomorrow, its his baby but we don't use it much around here and it is a ski boat so its not really practical for this area but it is his/our baby, and i told him to think really hard about selling it and not to if he wasn't sure, and his response was he wants to sell it to pay off his debts, so we can get into a house quicker and i thought that was incredibly sweet!!! we can get a fishing/skiing boat down the track... he is such a sweeti. And i know how lucky i'am....
Am kinda over Chrissy already, so much stress, rushing around and not to mention money, its just excessive....i sound like such a humbug hehe. Im sure i will enjoy Christmas day with my family, well whats left of my family, everyone is at each others throats for reasons i can't quite say, but i will say that certain members of my family won't be in the same room with each other EVER again, which is sooo sad and i feel in the middle and am trying to remain neutral but its not really happening! I hope things work out and they can put aside their differences in the near future... Seems almost everyone has family dramas this time of year lol strange!
As for my eating habits, well lets not go there, i will say this though i have never ate so much Macca's as i have this week, just cause of being so so busy and never home...Bad Nikki Bad!!! Back on track again after Chrissy though... Oh and i'am going to try my hardest to give up smoking in the New Year, for my health, to save money and for my upcoming Banding!!!
Still staring at my ring, my engagement ring that is hahahahaha! ;>, i'am also starting to look for reception venues, dresses, invite ideas etc so i have a ideas for when we decide to set a date, which we r both thinking won't be for about 2-3yrs, til we get settled into a house, save some $ and i get banded and on my way to my goal weight, then we will set a date.... Which im quite happy with, because i want to feel so damn sexy and glamorous on our wedding day and i know losing some weight will be a major factor in that!
Am spending NYE in sydney, right on the harbour at my mums work to watch the BIG fireworks show....am soo looking forward to it, it's my first NYE off in like 4 or 5 years, bring it on hehe.... Am really looking forward to a New Year with new beginnings, adventures and fun....and most of all a NEW ME!
I hope everyone has an Incredible,safe and Happy Chrissy and New Year and all the best for 2009..... see u in the New Year :)

fingers crossed!

Well, to start with, i have had heartburn for like 2days, and it is driving me nuts, not to mention kinda painful! dammit, go away lol! :( iv drank enough mylanta for a horse lol and no change and i can't think of anything i ate that wouldv caused it.... any home remedies anyone wants to share? more than welcome.
Slowly coming down off cloud 9, still catch myself staring at my ring, its sooo pretty and sparkley hehe im in love...with my ring hehe. and my fiance of course ;) Haven't really set a date but we are thinking probably 2ish years, but i have found a dress that i adore, its so sexy and classic, and also unique.... why is it that most or should i say majority of plus size bridal dresses are hideous, out dated and boring???!!! hmmm tisk tisk designers! :p
We've decided we want to get a house first and have put in 2 offers on a couple and are waiting to hear back, got my fingers crossed....everyone cross everything for us and send positive vibes my way please :> we so found our dream home but they are being greedy greedy vendors lol SELL US THE HOUSE!!! But if it's meant to be it will be huh.
As for my weight i have lost 1kg and have had a few comments from people saying i have lost when i can't even notice it...could be all the sex LMAO!! :0 am dying for july to be here already, want this band sooooo badly u would not believe... i also ordered a book to help with the mind taming that needs to take place for me to succeed with my weight loss...it's called the Gabriel Method, anyone tried or heard of it? Its meant to help re-educate ur mind and thought process so won't hurt...
Put the Chrissy tree up tonight,looks great and it's made it feel more like Christmas...Hope Santa comes to me haha...
Well im off to drink some more mylanta.....HEARTBURN BE GONE!!!! grrrrr lol.

On Cloud 9...Im ENGAGED!!! :>

WOW...I keep staring at my finger in amazement and happiness...i can't believe that iam actually ENGAGED to the most amazing, sweet, strong, kind, man and that i had no idea that he was going to pop the question. I mean i had a feeling it would happen soon but had no clue he was going to ask me to marry him at the beach, under the stars on our 2year Anniversary!!! Im so so so HAPPY!!! It was so sweet when he knelt down on one knee and told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, reached in his pocket for a little white box with the most gorgeous ring inside...R u serious i said lol, i started crying surprisingly and said YES I don't know how many times...What an amzing day...i haven't stopped smiling :) :) :) And won't for a long time.
So now we are Engaged and looking for a house to buy and make a home together everything just seems sooo right. Iam now even more than before sooo determined to get my band ASAP and look amazing for myself, my health and OUR WEDDING DAY!!!
I just feel so much more driven and motivated now to lose weight and get fit and feel good about myself and love myself as much as my FIANCE does, hehehe so strange to say lol...
So iv had such a AMAZING start to the week i honestly don't think anything could bring me down at the moment! Going to look at more houses this saturday...they are getting cheaper and cheaper, found one we adore but didnt want to rush in, keep looking til we know when its the one!
Work is good getting more shifts.... finally, really need the $ and we got our staff Chrissy party on the 14th and im so excited and hoping i don't end up as messy as last year hahaha ;>,
Jumped on the scales and am down 1kg, i'm not sure why, i haven't been trying lol, weird, maybe once u stop u lose weight...who knows...
So i just had to update u all on the BIG NEWS...and just type it so i believe it too lol....